…conventional wisdom suggests keeping a daily gratitude journal. But one study revealed that those who had been assigned to do that ended up less happy than those who had to count their blessings only once a week. Lyubomirsky therefore confirmed her hunch that timing is important. So is variety, it turned out: a kindness intervention found that participants told to vary their good deeds ended up happier than those forced into a kindness rut.
Here is more.
Libertarianism GMU style – selfishness all the way.
“So is variety, it turned out: a kindness intervention found that participants told to vary their good deeds ended up happier than those forced into a kindness rut.”
Hence the wisdom of the bumper sticker to commit *random* acts of kindness…
Making a point to conduct acts of kindness can certainly put a person in a rut. Happiness requires a balance, and proactively searching out “good deeds” would be akin to someone on a crash diet.
However, often times – I would say most often – the kindest thing a person can do on a normal, routine basis is to just say the right thing (or even say nothing at all).
Compliment a co-worker’s new blonde highlights without being flirtatious (flirting is a different subject entirely). Ask someone about themselves beyond how are you doing. Resist talking about yourself.
I read Joseph Telushkin’s “Words That Hurt, Words That Heal† and it made a huge difference in how I interact with people.
Lyubomirsky began studying happiness as a graduate student in 1989 after an intriguing conversation with her adviser, Stanford University psychologist Lee D. Ross, who told her about a remarkably happy friend who had lost both parents to the Holocaust. Ross explains it this way: “For this person, the meaning of the Holocaust was that it was indecent or inappropriate to be unhappy about trivial things–and that one should strive to find joy in life and human relationships.” Psychologists have long known that different people can see and think about the same events in different ways, but they had done little research on how these interpretations affect well-being.
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