“May I meet you?”

Bill Ackman suggests that opener as a way for men to meet women, and notes it worked for him when he was younger and unmarried.  Like this: “I would ask: “May I meet you?” before engaging further in a conversation. I almost never got a No. It inevitably enabled the opportunity for a further conversation. I met a lot of really interesting people this way. I think the combination of proper grammar and politeness was the key to its effectiveness. You might give it a try.”

In response, a bunch of people have shrieked that he is a billionaire (he was not then, though perhaps he had Aristotelian billionaire potentiality?), that he is six foot three (he probably was tall back then too), and that he is good looking.  Or perhaps effective meeting and dating strategies have changed?

I readily admit I am well below average in this and all related areas concerning either meeting strangers or chatting up women, whether it concerns knowledge or praxis.  But I have an opinion nonetheless.

I observe that so many young men these days just do not make much effort at all.  They do not approach women with any sort of opening line, whether in person or through apps.  If this gets them off the zero point, it is almost certainly a good thing.  Maybe it is bad tactics for some people, if only because you are too nerdy and cannot deliver the words with the right charming tone.  So be it.  The young men with that problem can then adjust and try it some other way.  It is still a plus to get them thinking about opening lines at all, and to think about meeting women at all.  So I am fully on board with Bill’s suggestion.  He never said that is all you should be doing, or to make that your main thing.  It is unlikely that his suggestion is the best thing you could be doing, think of it simply as pressing the “activation button” on seeking a partner.

It is a bit like my advice on writing.  Your big enemy is not “I did not get enough written today.”  Rather it is “I did not write today at all.”  That point applies to so many different aspects of life.  Discrete choice econometrics!

Addendum: Bill adds that it works better when you are moving.  Let’s avoid this equilibrium.  And here are some other comments, I am not sure of the proper attribution.